Chakra-Less, and Stuck with The Akatsuki Love Birds
by Yuki no Yugure
Summary: Naruto is captured by the newest Akatsuki member, Zori, and Hidan. But Hidan messed up the jutsu Zori was preforming and now, Naruto has no chakra, and forgot how to use taijutsu. What will happen when Naruto has to live with Zori, and the rest of the Akatsuki for a year?
1. Hidan, you Baka!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form. Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

Warning: This story has mature content including; Language, sexual content and violence.

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Chapter 1: HIDAN, YOU BAKA!

~Zori's prov~

"OK, now all we have to do is seal his chakra up 'till we get back to the base." I said as thought aloud.

Hidan, snorted, like the jack ass he is. "Yeah, sweet cheeks, how the fuck do you think we do that?" He walked over and kicked the kids unconscious body, he guffawed when the body twitched.

I rolled my eyes and fake gagged at the nick name. "I know a jutsu, dip-shit." I formed a few signs, bit my thumb, and continued. I bent down and was about to place the seal when Hidan slapped my ass. I slammed my hand down with the wrong amount of chakra, but the seal formed to fast for me to stop. I glowered at Hidan. He smirked like a pervert. " YOU BAKA! WHO KNOWS HOW LONG THE SEAL WILL LAST NOW!"

He snarled at me. "Bitch! I'm not a baka!" He crossed his arms and stuck his nose up. "I'm a fucking smart person! I just do really damn stupid shit..."

My eye twitched as soon they both darkened, and my blood lust grew. "I'm gonna kill you..." I said it just above a whisper.

He cupped his ear. "What was that bitchy?" He smirked.

I wrapped my hands around his neck and gripped it with chakra. "I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL YOU UNTIL YOU ARE FUCKING DEAD, YOU CRAZY ASS, SON OF A BITCH!". I laughed like a crazy person when his face turned purple.

"What the hell did he do now?" the mysterious voice came from above us.

I looked up, hands still on Hidan's neck, and saw the big white bird starts to land. A smile found its way onto my lips "Hello Deidara no Danna." I shook Hidan a little as I spoke, then giggled as he made a gurgling noise.

The blond bomber raised an eyebrow.

My hands loosened on Hidan's neck, and I got up to show respect my senpai. "He violated me as I was performing a jutsu and now...the 9 tails may or not may be locked up powerless for his lifetime."

The Jashint rubbed his neck and croaked out "Bitch" and mumbled a few more curses.

I stifled a laugh.

Deidara frowned. "Crap..." His clay creation walked over and gulped down he 9 tails. "I'll get his body there faster, you 2 walk, and try not to kill one another, hmm" He jumped up on the bird and it took off.

Eyes, glued to him as he flew away at incredible speeds. I could only gape at him, at his grace yet power. I was proud, proud to call him my Danna, proud to see his wonderful art, proud to meet and know such an amazing man.

"WHERE IS NARUTO?!" A pinked hair girl flew out of the woods. She then flung a tree at us! A FREAKING TREE! Hidan and I dodged it easily. She looked as crazed as the 9 tails himself. "TELL ME OR SO HELP ME, I WILL KILL EVERY ONE OF YOU WITH MY BARE HANDS!"

I chuckled and said to Hidan "Shall we take our leave?" I sent a smirk flying the girls way.

Hidan laughed "Hell yes."

I flipped her off and threw some smoke bombs out to make our get away. We ran like hell to get out of there. Hidan was too slow, so I grabbed his arm and ran at full speed dragging him behind me.

~~~~~~~~~~~With Deidara~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Deidara's prov~

A sigh escaped my lips "Pein is gonna have their asses for this, un..." I couldn't help but worry about Zori, she only joined 3 months ago and now she messed up, and on the extreme level as well. I should've told Pein not to pair her up with Hidan, but no I just had to keep my mouth shut for once. Now the poor thing might have to trade places with Tobi and let him become a member. I shivered at the thought of that dumb ass joining. I'll never let that happen. I'll just explain to Pein that its Hidan's fault, which it is, and hope Zori dosen't get in trouble, or worse...I cleared my mind off the problem and focused on flying, and could only hope this might turn out like I want it too.

~~~~~~~~~~~In Amegakure~~~~~~~~~~~~

I flew down on to the wet and muddy grounds of Amegakure. I jumped down, shook the water from my hair as best I could and flipped off the clouds, hopefully Pein didn't see that with the chakra rain he might have been using... In a flash of lightning Zori and Hidan appeared next to me, Zori laughing as Hidan ran to the bushes and puked up a spleen, or it least sounded like he was.

Zori smiled brightly at me "Hello, again, Deidara no Danna." She bowed in respect.

I nodded back her, and smiled "I'm surprised, usually you are the one with your head in the bush when you do that." I started walking and the bird flew just above the ground.

She clasped her stomach and frowned "I try not to think about it..." She jogged up to me, and looked at the ground, frowning in disappointment. "I'm sorry Deidara no Danna, I messed up, and I have no clue of the size of the problem I caused..."

I glanced at her, and then looked up at the clouds letting the rain stream down my face. "You did mess up..." She looked even more depressed. "But we can't change it now, hmmm. So lets move forward and let what fate choose what happens next."

A determined look showed on her face and she nodded. "Hai! Deidara no Danna!"

Hidan stumbled up and glared at Zori "Bitch..." he snarled at her. The villagers around us saw this and hid knowing what would happen if they got in Hidan's way at the wrong time, well, right time in a sense.

At that moment a little girl ran into him.

He smirked evilly and bent down and said "Hey, little whore, have you heard of Jashin?" He gripped her collar and got his kunai out.

"Hidan. Don't lay another finger on that child or you will have Pein and me to deal with." The villagers cheered for Konan calling her, 'lady Angel'. Konan walked over and grabbed the kid nicely and held her. "Are you OK little one?"

"H-hai, lady a-angel." She was shocked to see Konan.

Konan Smiled lightly and made a origami butterfly and handed it to her. "Please try to watch where you are going next time."

The little girl nodded, and gracefully took the paper butterfly.

Konan set her down.

She scrambled to her parent to show them her gift. She turned, glared at Hidan and glance at Zori and me.

"Was the mission accomplished?" Konan asked.

I was the first to speak, "Yes, but there was a complication."

She glanced at me. "Will discuss this with Pein." and with that we ran to the base.


	2. Stuck with the Aktsuki!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form. Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

Warning: This story has mature content including; Language, sexual content and violence.

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~Naruto's prov~

"So he'll be sealed up for how long?"

Who is that? Sealed, who?

"Well, judging by the markings of my seal, it will be about a year or so..."

Are they talking about me? Did I lose control over the 9 tail's chakra again?

"Any side affects?"

What is going on? I choose to sit up, and look at the doctors. "Hey what..." The Akatsuki?! I hopped out of the bed they had me in but got dizzy and fell on my face.

"As seen, dizziness." The girl talking walked over, grabbed the back of my shirt and pulled me up. "Get up, you twit." She dragged m over to the bed and sat me down.

"Zori, treat our guest with respect." A tall, shady man with spiky, orange, hair and ringed eyes command to her.

She straighten up and nodded "Hai! Leader-sama." She glared at me. "Take off your shirt and if you refuse will force you." She had long brown hair, some of it covering her left eye. I looked at her head band, Cloud missing nin, huh? She looked st me harder "Did I stutter?"

I frowned and striped my shirt off. "Why are you doing this?"

She ignored me, bit her thumb and wrote a symbol on my chest. A new seal formed above my old seal. "He lost all chakra usages and his muscle memory forgot taijutsu, we also can't tap into his chakra, so now he is basically a normal person."

"NANI?! WHAT DID YOU DO?!" I panicked and thrashed around. "LET ME GO!" I then slapped the girl, opened handed, right across her left cheek.

A dark, cold, dry and static aura formed around her, she growled lowly. "How dare you~." She half whispered.

~Deidara's prov~

I walked by the med room when I saw the 9 tails slap Zori across the face. The air got cold and dry. She whispered some thing. I ran in and grabbed her before she could attack him. She thrashed around in pure rage. "Whoa! Zori, calm down, hmm!"

She snarled at him "HOW DARE YOU EVEN LAY A HAND ON ME?! YOU ARE IN NO POSITION TO EVEN THINK OF FIGHTING BACK!" Her struggling was getting more and more desperate.

I started to slowly drag her out of the room before it could get any messier. "Zori! Calm down you are making a fool of your self!" I got her into the hall, and Pein shut the door. She still struggled. "Time to grow up Zori, hmm. Get over it!" I grabbed her by her hair and dragged her to our shared room, shut off the lights and threw her on the floor and stood in front of the door to make sure she doesn't run out. Pulling her by her hair and sticking her in a dark room always calmed her down when she would get pissed. "Better?" I soften my tone so she would stay calm.

I heard her shuffle a little "Yeah, some what..." The sound of footsteps came from where she was, she walked up next to me and turned the lights back on. She gave me an apologetic look.

I nodded to her, placing a hand on her shoulder "Just try to keep clam next time...Maybe things will end out better, hmm." A reassuring smile made its way on to my lips.

When she smiled back I could tell it wasn't a true smile just one to make me leave her be on the topic. "Should we go back, or wait to see if Pein calls us?" She titled her head wondering what we should do.

I shrugged "It's been a long day. You should try to rest and I'll wait to see if he comes to get us." A quick pat on the shoulder and I sent her on her way to her side of the room.

She took off her sandals and curled up on her bed and tried to relax. She was slightly snoring in a 5 to 10 minute span.

I shook my head while chuckling. A knock at the door made me jump and open it. "Hello. And don't yell, Zori is trying to rest."

Sasori no Danna gave me a look, but dismissed it. "Pein wants everyone to spar today, let's go and don't make us wait, brat." He walked away after that.

I sighed, poor Zori, just fell asleep. I walked over and shook her shoulder lightly. "Zori. We need to go train, get up, hmm."

She sat up and looked at me a little pissed but nodded. The shoes were put back on, and walked out of the room.

~Naruto's prov~

I sit there. On the side of the Akatsuki training ground. In between that shark looking guy and Itachi Uchiha. It was awkward and unsettling. Silence that was all, no talking, not one word. I almost jumped up and hugged the masked guy when he came up.

"Hello, Kisame and Itachi senpai. Tobi is a good boy!" he squealed like a 4-year-old while jumping up and down. "Who are you? Do you think Tobi is a good boy?"

I leaned in to the shark guy, I guess, who is called Kisame. "Is this guy high or something?"

Kisame frowned and had a sweat drop. "No, sadly, he is very sober..." He sighed sadly.

Itachi gave a cold "hn" and stood up. "Where are the others, Tobi?" He glanced at the crazy guy.

"Tobi told them and they said 'get the 'bad word' away Tobi and we'll 'bad word' be there in a 'bad word' minute' Hidan senpai said that. Is Tobi a good boy Itachi senpai?" he looked like he was gonna die if he didn't hear yes.

All Itachi did was 'hn' at him.

He squealed like a girl this time and danced around.

I had a double sweat drop "No wonder you guys can be ass holes...you have to deal with this guy..." I said to myself quietly. 5 more people appeared from the trees and landed by us.

The blond walked over and knocked Tobi upside the head. "Knock it off you Baka, hmm! I could hear you all the way back at the base!"

Tobi grabbed his head and sniffled "Tobi a bad boy~" he looked at the girl and pointed at the blond "Zori-Chan~ Senpai hit me~"

He hit him again "Hell yeah I did! And I'd do it again and again!"

The girl put her hands up in defense "What makes you think I can boss Deidara no Danna around?"

He tilted his head "But I thought the girlfriend had control over her boyfriend." Most of the others laughed.

They both blushed and pointed at one another "He/She is not my girl/boyfriend!(hmm)" they shouted it in unison. The blond hit him as did the girl while screaming "BAKA!(UN)" Again, most of them was laughing.

The guy with the stitches all over his arm, and mask over his face spoke up "get training, we don't pay you to get your sorry asses kicked." thy all jumped off to different parts of the field and started fighting one another in their little groups.

"Awe~ you look lonely~. **No you look delicious. **To bad we have to wait a year to eat you up~.** To bad indeed...**" Then and evil chuckle came from behind me.

I turned and saw half a giant plant with he Akatsuki robe on laughing, I made a face and turned back around and awkwardly stared at the other Akatsuki members spar. the Akatsuki is weird, evil, and twisted. I know that for sure. I hope the guys from the leaf village find me before a year is up or...I don't even want to think about it...

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(sorry if I didn't answer your question the right way, I'm very new to the site)

After down the line, and bear the end, there might be a little Narusaku.


	3. Behind the Bombing Devil

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form. Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

Warning: This story has mature content including; Language, sexual content and violence.

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~Deidara's prov~

Zori kicked my chest and I was sent flying back and hit a tree. "*cough* uh~ nice Z-Zori *cough cough* I think you ruptured my sternum but nice kick." I bent over to the side and coughed up a bit of breakfast.

Zori ran over and lifted my chin up "Well, Deidara no Danna, I did ask if you wanted me to slow down, and you can't rupture your sternum, you can only break it..." her hand glowed that lively green and she placed it on my chest healing and damage she done.

"Wow you Akatsuki members suck at close combat..." The blond brat came over and sat by where we were smiling like we were his best of friends or something. I glared at him, he gave a glare back "Look just because I have no chakra and other stuff isn't gonna stop me from beating you and becoming the Hokage'ttebayo."

I ignored him and enjoyed the cool, refreshing feeling that I get when Zori heals me. I smiled and closed my eyes as she continued. When she was done and pulled he hand away, I frowned as that feeling went away, too.

She placed her hand back on my chest and applied pressure. "Dose that hurt?"

I shook my head no.

She smiled lightly, but dropped to a serious face. "Shall we continue sparing Deidara no Danna?"

Before I could answer that Itachi-teme walked over. "Zori, leader-sama says that you must watch the 9 tails since you placed the seal on him." He didn't even look the slightest bit fazed, that pissed my off.

I stood up, and walked away from his gloominess before I turned as emo as him. I got so pissed I shoved my hand into my clay pouch, formed a clay bird and set it high in the sky. I waited a second and made the half ram sign. "**KATSU!**" That one word was seeping rage. It may have been a C1 but my anger made it a C3. I smirked when every one on the training field took one step away from me.

Zori looked at me then back at Itachi-teme. "What does 'watch the 9 tails' mean, babysit him?" She looked half as pissed as me, but more towards Pein then the Uchiha.

Itachi-teme sighed "Yes, he'll even sleep in you quarters."

Zori, the twit, and I gaped. I spoke first. "Awe HELL NO, UN! HE'LL NOT EVEN STEP ONE FOOT NEAR OUR ROOM, HMM!" All my stress and anger showed through, I was just about to snap. The concern on Zori's face at my yelling calmed me slightly, but when he 'hn'ed me, I lost all control. 10 minutes of wrestling later, Kisame held my arms, Kakuzu had my legs, Sasori no Danna kept some chakra strings attached to my limbs as well, and Zori was trying to calm me down with some words.

The blond little shit hid behind a tree like the coward he is.

Zori looked me in the eye. "Deidara, please calm down." Her voice was soft almost a whisper. "I know Itachi-san can be difficult to handle with, but you need to take a few deep breaths and calm, ok?" Her tone was sweeter than normal, it was very relaxing.

I did take a few breaths to calm slightly.

Until Itachi-teme opened his mouth again. "And the 9 tails has to take Deidara's bed."

I used pure rage to get out of all their grips. I was just about to tackle him, but Zori grabbed me from behind and hugged me close.

She whispered sadly "Dei stop. Just please stop, anger and rage gets you nowhere, so stop before it gets to deep of a hole." She rubbed her head against my back.

I froze dead. I didn't know what to say or do back. I just stood there, dumbstruck. I blushed "Z-Zori, could you let go? I find this really awkward..." I was so...I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS FEELING! But whatever it was, I no longer had my speech quirk.

She finally let go. Even though she knew I could sense the worry seeping off her, she kept to her self and looked away.

Kakuzu sighed "I guess that ends training for the day..." Most of us nodded.

~~~~~~~~~~~In the woods between the training field and the base~~~~~~~~~~~~

I looked over at Zori when a thought entered my mind. "Zori, un? If the 9 tails has to take my bed, doesn't that mean we share yours, un?"

A deep blush was on her cheeks "Y-you c-could-d sl-eep o-on th-the fl-floor..." She looked away, probably blushing more.

I frowned "But if I do, I could get sick. And then I would still have to be in your bed, so pick now. Sick, gross me or healthy, non contagious me..."

She looked back at me. "I'll settle with the 2nd one thank you..." She smiled at me slightly.

The twit opened his mouth. "Or you could have your bed and I could sleep with her~" he wiggled his eyebrows.

Zori turned green at the thought. "do you wish..."

I laughed at his face.

~~~~~~~~~~~In the base~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zori moved a few of her pillows making the bed bigger. "Better not be a sleep pervert Deidara no Danna~" she said in a joking tone.

I moved all my crap into the closet and laughed at Zori's comment. "Will find out later now won't we, un?"

She giggled and gave me a look.

The 9 tails looked like he was gonna puke if it got any fluffier.

I sat on her bed when we were both done, and took my hair down, letting it fall down. I shook my head an placed it where it should be. After that I took off my sandals, top layer crop shirt, and clay pouches.

She had taken her sandals off, under shirt, and put her hair in a loose pony tail. "Rules; no poking or prodding, no touching any limbs, and no licking, so help me Deidara, you lick me with your hand mouth, I will beat you~" she narrowed her eyes at me.

I snickered laid out on the bed. "Yeah, ok, un. Good night...geek." I laughed lightly at her new nickname.

She laid down after me and close her eyes slowly drifting to sleep. "Good...night...Dei..." And she was asleep.

I smiled sweetly at her and started to fall asleep myself.


	4. Wait, You Two Aren't Dating!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form. Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

Warning: This story has mature content including; Language, sexual content and violence.

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~Zori's prov~

When I woke up, I kept my eyes shut. My bed was extra warm and soft, but firm, this morning. I could feel Deidara breath from the other side of my bed. If I moved my head a little I could hear his heart beat on the other side, too. Wait, since when dose sound travel through fabric and foam? Oh please don't tell me...Please do not tell me! I lifted my hand and felt above myself. I thought I grabbed a nose, so I squeezed it to check.

There was a grunt then, "Could you please let go of my nose, Zori..." Deidara's breath hitched a bit. "I'm gonna-heh..."

I let go not wanting snot all over my hand. I blushed as his chest raised and fell in an odd rhythm.

"heh-heh...hih" He placed his elbow over his mouth and nose. "hih-heh-_Hehitsssh! Hihesshh_..."

I bit back a moan when I felt the sharp inhale and then burst in his chest. "B-bless you~" I squeezed my eyes shut.

He removed his elbow from his face, "Zori, hmm? Why are you laying on top of me...?" He sounded tired, apparently he wasn't expecting that wake up call.

"You tell me...I woke up and found myself on top of you, so yeah..." You could feel the awkwardness spreading around the room. I blushed madly red and lifted up the blanket. "Oh thank god..." I sighed we were both still in our clothing, thankfully...

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU 2 DOING?!" The blond baka blushed and turned away. "I DON'T WANNA SEE THAT!"

Deidara blushed red "Its not what it looks like, un! She-then-or-I-look I don't know what happen but I know that it was not sex, un!"

I blushed insanely red because of the picture that ran through my mind and soon fainted after.

~Naruto's prov~

I blushed more "Well do whatever you were doing somewhere else!" I yelled back.

He ignored me and shook the girl "Zori? Zori, are you-and she fainted..." He huffed.

The guy with the mask walked in and screamed, covering his eye hole with one hand. "TOBI SORRY HE WALKED IN ON SENPAI AND ZORI-CHAN MAKING BABIES, TOBI A BAD BOY~" He ran way crying at the implanted scar in his brain.

Blondie pinched the bridge of his nose and spook to himself aloud "Great, now Hidan will use this as black mail, hmm..."

At that moment, a gray haired guy walked in snapped a picture and laughed "Take that you fucking barbie." He laughed more and walked away.

The blond guy winced in embarrassment. Then I saw his temper raising, and after yesterday, I wasn't gonna be around to see that...

I got up and ran down the hall. The Akatsuki Hideout was nicer then you would think, even if it had the whole red, white and black color pallet. The walls were carved dark oak wood, a red carpeted floor, and every 10 feet or so a pot of white, almost paper looking, flowers. The doors were the black I was talking about. I get to the living room and gape. The had a red leather couch, a really big flat screen, and it was a black shaggy rug. For an evil organization they're pretty tricked out. Anything in he room that had eyes stared at me...

Kisame looked at the hallway then back at me "Isn't Zori supposed to be watching you?"

"She fainted...can I know all your names...its getting really annoying not..." I frowned, it really does get annoying say who is who by their hair color...

Kisame grinned and showed his sharp teeth "I'm Kisame, you probably know about Itachi, the red head in the corner of the room is Sasori." Sasori flipped Kisame off. "The guy with gray hair is Hidan, his partner's name is Kakuzu, he has the mask over his face, the guy with the orange mask is Tobi, the blond that owns the bed you sleep on is Deidara, the brunette is Zori, Deidara's girl friend, the ginger with piercings is Pein, and his partner Konan, the women with blue hair."

Deidara and Zori walked out of the hallway doorway and sat on the couch, Zori was still bright red.

The said they weren't dating but it could be the whole secret relationship thing...I got some guts and asked "So how long you two been dating?" I sat down it the chair closest to me.

Zori glared at Kisame like she was here the whole conversation.

Deidara blew a fuse "What the hell, un? We! Are! Not! Dating! Is it just because we sleep in the same room?! I don't love Zori, never will, there is nothing to love about her! She is a nobody! ..." he suddenly realized what he just said. "Zori, its not like that..."

She stood up "Well, great to know I'm a nobody everyone fucking hates, even hated by you freaks of nature!" She stormed out of the room. The room shook as lightning struck outside.

Kisame frowned and looked at Itachi. "I'm not a freak of nature, right Itachi-san?" he sounded desperate.

Itachi gave him a side glance.

He hung his head "The truth hurts, Itachi-san, it really dose."

Itachi 'hn'ed him and read a book he was holding.

"Looking tasty as usually 9 tails~**That made us sound like a pedo. **But its true~ **How gay are you? **I'm not gay~** Sure you aren't...**" two voices came from behind me.

I jumped out of the chair and hid behind Sasori. "What the hell are you?!"

Sasori growled "Brat~ get away from me." he turned and gave me the most coldest glare I've ever seen.

I nearly peed myself, i ran over and hid behind Kisame "Holy crap! You are some scary people..." I fake sobbed.

Deidara got up and walked out of the room. "Great, we have another Tobi, un..."

Speaking of Tobi he came running in crying. "Zetsu-san! Zetsu-san! I Saw Zori-chan and Senpai making babies~" he cried more.

Hidan came in laughing. "Hell yeah! I have a fucking picture of it!" He laughed louder.

The plant talked to Tobi and Hidan. "Its ok Tobi, you are a good boy.** I need to see that fucking picture, now! **I don't want to see that. **Close your eye then. **No! **Bitch!**" They fought more.

I leaned into Kisame "Who or what is that thing?!" I flinched every time it breathed.

Kisame laughed "That's Zetsu, won't be hard to forget him..." he chuckled.

I nodded in agreement but still hid.

~Deidara's prov~

I couldn't find Zori anywhere. I felt really bad because I never meant that. There is many things to love about Zori, her geekiness, how sensitive she an be, her strength, and they way she fights with lightning. She moves with so much grace and gentleness, but so static and fast. Her style is true art, fleeting. I love so many this about Zori. But never will I tell her. She looks up to me, as her Danna, as her partner, and as her friend. Telling her would take away all respect she has in me. Me. Is that it? I can't tell her for selfish reasons? Or do I see this in a different view than it is? Why is this so hard? I want to tell her, but I can't. But why? What is holding me back? The thought of rejection? Dignity? Lonesome? Love? Love, puppy love, a crush, that's it! I have feelings for Zori, but can't express them. Now that I figured that out, how do I tell her? What do I tell her? I can't say I love her, it just not right...Ugh~ this is taking up to much thought. I need to find Zori and we'll go from there and see how it turns out in the end. I really hope this wasn't a bad idea. I walked further down the hall and got to our bedroom door. I heard soft whimpering. She was crying. I made her cry. Now every bone in my body aches. I knocked on the door. "Zori, are you in here, hmm? I'm sorry...I didn't mean to say what I said...When I'm stressed and angry, things I don't mean slip out of my mouth..." She didn't answer. "I know you are mad and you possibly h-hate me but I still want to apologies and hope you understand..." I chocked on the word hate, this was starting to get emotional, if it hadn't already.

"Its ok, I understand." Her word sounded blunt, hard, and cold. She was really upset.

"Can I come in? I want to talk to you..." What I was gonna do next is beyond me, but I'll try something.

"No." so blunt and non hesitant.

I sighed. I'll just wait a little bit she would need time to think. Lets just hope it doesn't take long...


	5. Don't Mess with Sasori

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form. Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

Warning: This story has mature content including; Language, sexual content and violence.

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~Sasori's prov~

The air suddenly got dry and staticy like just before a lightning storm.

The 9 tails clung to my chair like a wet paper to skin.

"YOU LITTLE BLOND RETREADED DICK! GET YOUR DEMON ASS THE FUCK OVER HERE!" And then the always _wonderful_ Zori and her colorful vocabulary usage stormed in the room, no pun intend, with static forming around her, electric blue eyes glowing, and making lightning flash outside every few seconds or so. Her right eye twitched, "Would you like to repeat that you little puke?!"

I started to fix the creaky part of the 3rd Kazekage, barely caring what happens. He dies, its his problem...

"W-what are you talking about I didn't say anything..." Ha. He tried to reason with Zori, that's rich.

Pein walked in and stared down Zori. "Zori. I do not appreciate you blowing MY hideout to bits with lightning, or harming our guest..." He narrowed his eyes at her.

She gave the 9 tails on last glance and calmed her chakra down..."Hn..." She turned and walked back to her room probably.

As I contained to work on the 3rd Kazekage, the 9 tails jumped up, bumping my chair, that made the screwdriver in my hand jam and break the joint on the 3rd Kazekage. I stared hard at the large crack in the irreplaceable arm...I clenched my teeth and my fists. "122 days and 15 hours of hard work to make a fine piece like this, cracked up the arm..." I let my "stomach" cable slide out from under my cloak. It slithered like a snake till it was inches from the 9 tails neck. "do you have a hint of a clue how LONG this will take to repair?" I stood up sending the chair I was in sliding back. I lost all my patients by this point. "WEEKS, MANY MANY KAMI DAMNED WEEKS! IT TOOK ME LITTLE OVER 1/3 OF A YEAR TO MAKE THIS, AND NOW I HAVE TO SPEND HALF OF THAT TIME AMOUNT REPAIRING IT?!" Forturent for me the next person to enter the room was Hidan, and knowing I could not take my anger out on the 9 tails, I sent the cable shooting through Hidan's chest and hitting the wall behind, instead.

He hit the wall and was trapped because the cable held him there. "OI, DOLL FUCKER! WHAT THE HELL-"

The cable moved up and ripped out is vocal cords. "Shut up or so help me I'll turn you into a puppet..." I smirked.

"Sasori, stand down." Pein spoke up AFTER I already did some messy damage.

I spun only my head around to look at him. I smiled more when the 9 tails neary shit himslf, but I went emotionless when I looked at Pein. "Oh and why should I?" I wasn't afraid of Pein.

"Because if you don't, you would be one of the Akatsuki's newest target..." He 'threaten' to kick me out and turn me into a prize bounty...hn like that would ever happen.

I sighed thinking this through, why make a sence when I could get started fixing the 3rd Kazekage. My cable recoiled back in its cavity in my "stomach". I then took my leave, without another word.

~~~~~~~~~~~In the Kitchen~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Zori's prov~

"That little ass is gonna get a kunai shoved up his-" before I could layout my revenge plan I ran into Deidara no Danna, spilling the hot tea he was holding, all over him and myself. I made a "-_-'" face.

Deidara cursed. "Smooth geek."

Before I could make any sort of comment he striped his shirt off. The redness on my face could beat a tomato. I tried to speak, "ah-dggujbdj-uh-fghhbyfbj." I did say tried...

He giggled(in a manly way, mind you) and smirked, "Wow that nickname I gave you fits you perfectly, geek, hmm." He laughed at his own joke.

Tobi watched the whole thing...then thought it would be funny to shove Deidara while his guard was down. So I saw Tobi pop up behind Diedara and he shoved him into me.

I'm a strong person, but wasn't I expecting Deidara to come flying at me. When he hit me I fell backwards bring him with me...

~Deidara's prov~

As I uncovered from the small collision I noticed that...I WAS KISSING ZORI! My eyes instantly went wide.

When Zori realized what we were doing, she had the same facial expression as I did, just blushing a lot more...She pulled back "D-Dei-dara-"

I pushed my lips back on to hers, closing my eyes and giving into her delicate, soft, moist lips. I felt her give in as well, I smirked into the kiss. I opened my eye to see if she really did give in, but instead I saw a pair of blue feet the size of my head a little ways from us. Oh, you could just feel his sharp toothy grin in the air, and the air pressure of 'I fucking knew it'.

Zori didn't mind, she just happily wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me closer. She even gently nibbles my lips for entrence.

Just as I was about to let her explore my mouth, a insanely strong pair of hands gripped my shoulders, pulling me away from Zori and onto my feet in one tug. When I turned around I stared at an orange mask with one eye hole. "Tobi?! What the hell?! Ever touch me again, I'll kill you, un! And what were you doing-"

"I didn't like you touching Zori inappropriately...in the kitchen..." He fidgeted with his fingers.

I sighed "I shouldn't even touch my pupil with that kind of intention..." Was all I said to myself, I glanced at Tobi, he looked nervous and antsy. I rolled my eyes and glares at him. "No one cares that you are here any more so get the fuck out of the kitchen Tobi." Before I could say the rest Tobi helped Zori up and left the kitchen.

Zori looked at me and blushed a really red. "That never happen, n-nor will it ever happen again. And we shall for-forget this ever happened..." She stumbled on a few words...

I really didn't want to say I agree, but it's the right thing to do-what the hell am I talking about, the right thing to do? What the fuck?-Moving on..."I a-a-agree..." I forced it out as much as I could.

Kisame walked over. "Deidara, I am making dinner tonight I need you to go out and get some FRESH fish with Tobi." He stood up in front of me.

I didn't even want to argue. I just grabbed my shirt and left.

~Zori's prov~

I sighed. "He's gonna catch a cold again Kisame, he does EVERY time..." I gave him a side glance.

Kisame grinned "I know..." He started to walk away. "Oh, its also not my turn to make dinner...its Itachi-san's..." And he walked out of the kitchen.

I stood there, shocked, "You sneaky shark son of a bitch..." I left the kitchen and headed for the room. I took my time relooking everything in the hallway over for the sometenith time. I just had to laugh when I looked out one of the hallway windows and saw it start to rain. Poor Deidara no Danna...I finally got to the room, opened the door, and saw the nine tails curled up on Deidara's bed sleeping. I resisted the urge to drop things in his mouth, and walked over into the bathroom. I cleaned up a few things and set it up so Deidara could come back and take a warm shower first thing. Kisame is screwed if Deidara comes back with a fish...thats all I can say for now...


	6. The Masked Man's Crush Prt 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form. Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

Warning: This story has mature content including; Language, sexual content and violence.

* * *

~Zori's prov~

As I thought, Deidara came back all sniffly and what not. So I sent him to the shower, which he was totally willing about. Now I'm sitting on the couch, reading a book, "Make Out Paradise" or something like that, and blushing from the level of smuttieness . I casually toss the book behind me, and just relax.

Suddenly Tobi appeared right next to me. "HI~ ZORI-SEMPAI!"

I screamed. "TOBI! DON'T FUCKING DO THAT!" I pushed at the urge to slap him, then it crossed my mind that he had a mask and it would hurt...yeah.

"Tobi sorry!" He giggled but then sniffled and shivered.

I gave him a worried look. "Tobi, are you okay?" I placed my hand on his upper shoulder.

He shook his head a little. "I don't know." He sniffled again.

A sigh escaped my lips. "Ok, Tobi, go back to your room and I'll help ya out since you obviously aren't feeling to great. Ok?" I smiled softly to him. Looks like I'll be stuck taking care of two bakas...

~Obito's prov~

Zori smiled to me, I know she couldn't see it, but for the first time in a while, I smiled back. Though I was starting to feel like utter shit. I forced my voice into the retarded tone known as Tobi's voice "Ok, Zori-Sempai." Just as I stood up, a loud harsh sneeze came from down the hall.

Zori faceplamed. I heard her mumble to herself "That shower apparently did NOT help..." She stood up to. She smiled brightly, "Guess I'll walk there with you."

I didn't smile but she somehow saw that I would like that. When I opened my mouth to speak as Tobi, a dying cat noise with words was all I could hear. I instantly grabbed my neck and rubbed it, not like that would do anything...No talking as Tobi with a soar throat, I'll keep that in mind for other times...

She giggled. "I'll makes sure to make some tea with honey and a bowl of hot chicken broth for you later."

I nodded thankfully and started to walk back to my quarts, Zori followed me. But then I started to feel an itch in the back of nostril. It got stronger and stronger. I turned my head away from Zori, and took off my mask just in time for..."_Kashuuh_!" It, again, sounded like an animal dying, because I did not want to blow my cover. After I coughed to the point of bending fully down. When I placed my mask over my face, and straightened back up, I noticed Zori giving me a facial expression with a mix of "What the hell?" and worry...

"T-Tobi? You sound awful..." She had a slight look of pity in her eyes.

I cleared my throat enough to say a few words "Zori? Tobi need a hug..." I made Tobi as pitiful looking and sounding as possible, see if she'll go along with it.

A sad expression was on her face. She walked over and wrapped her arms around my neck. "Yes. Tobi does seem to need a hug." She smiled sadly. She then let go and walked ahead of me. She turned back to look at me. She smiled brightly...but suddenly it wasn't Zori who was smiling at me...

I felt me knees get wobbly, they buckled, and I was kneeling on the floor. My voice trembled as I spoke "R-Rin..." That's all I said, I didn't move, I didn't even breathe.

She smiled again and walked over closer to me and bent down. "Hey Obito, I l-" She started to fade, and her voice got to distant before she could finish.

My vision soon started to fade. Everything felt like is was spinning. Then it all went black, with a loud thud.

~Naruto's prov~

I jumped awake when a door closed in the room. I rubbed my eyes and looked around. I look over to what might be the bathroom and saw the blonde asshole standing there with only a towel on...I cover my eyes "Eww, man, get some clothes on!"

His only response was a raspy shout-type-thing that was so powerful he nearly doubled over, he sniffled and flipped me off. Turns out the "shout-type-thing" was a sneeze. He then coughed into his fist.

That's when it hit me. I laughed.

He glared at me. "What the hell *snf* are you laughing at?"

I snickered. "You're so weak, you got sick." I snickered more.

The look he sent was darker than midnight.

I instantly shut my mouth.

He turned away with a sniffle, and started to (finally) get clothes on. He lifted the blanket on the bed and laid down, pulling it back over him.

A loud crash and screaming came from the hall. "TOBI?!" Sounded like that chick, Zori.

Deidara-teme was standing up and running out the door before I could blink.

I followed him. We got to the hallway and I saw the guy with the mask, Tobi, out cold on the ground, and Zori freaking out slightly.

"Tobi?! Tobi! Get up!" She shook his shoulder. "Oh my god, this can't be happening!" She stood up and a panicked a little more.

Blondie started to sway, and he soon came toppling down to the ground.

Then Zori looked about ready to flip a table. "FOR FUCK SAKE- EVERYBODY STOP PASTING OUT!" She calmed down a bit, and looked at me. "I swear, you past out, you are going to have to drag yourself to the Medical Wing." She kneeled next to Deidara and moved him as much as she could so he was laying on his back, she the did the same for Tobi, but did it so that they were laying a foot from each other. She then placed her hand on Deidara's forehead, she frowned. Her hand started to glow green with chakra. "Naruto, go get the closest member you can find, and lead them back here as quick as possible." Her tone was serious and stern.

As much as I didn't want to, I nodded and ran down the hallway, and turned into the first open door which was the kitchen. I spotted Itachi reading a book. "Itachi...there is an emergency in the hallway, and we need help with-"

He looked up from the book with an ice-cold, rock hard, emotionless glint in his eyes. he shut his book and set it down on the counter. "If you're this worrisome about, it might actually worth my time." he looked me in the eyes with his now stoic coal-black eyes,signaling me to lead him to where Zori and the two others are.

It took me a moment but soon I was jogging back down the hall, with Itachi following. When we got there, Tobi had come to, sitting up, and was leaning against the wall. Zori looked up at Itachi, with her hand still on glowing green and on Deidara's forehead. "Itachi-san, I need help getting Deidara no danna and Tobi-kun to the med wing."

Itachi nodded and walked over to Tobi, and helped him stand up.

Zori tried to stand up with Deidara's limp body and her one of her hands full.

I walked over and helped her. and helped her walk all the way to a extremely white room with six beds and a giant counter top in the back with cabinets. We walked Deidara over to one of the farther beds while Itachi sat Tobi in the one right next to where Deidara was.

The second both of them were in a settled spot Zori got to work right away. She ran over to the sink grabbing a small dish and a cloth. Filling the small dish with water, she came back over and set the dish down on the table in between Tobi and Deidara. She set the cloth in the dish to soak up some water, then she turned to Deidara. She removed hid shirt, took the cloth out of the dish and placed it on his forehead while moving his fringe out of the way. She moved over to Tobi and closed the curtains around his bed.

~Zori's prov~

I turned to Tobi once the curtains were closed. "Tobi, like it or not, you need to remove your mask."


End file.
